#151 – Bag Fries

If you don’t know what I’m talking about then you either A) haven’t lived or B) have some self respect. Or, both.

For the uninitiated: Bag Fries are those fries that are left over at the bottom of your fast food bag. They’re typically accompanied by a grease stain of some kind that’s actually found a way to dampen the bottom of said bag.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Don’t worry! This is a good thing! Keep going! Enjoy!

Those bag fries, additionally, represent the previously impossible notion that the enormous portions these fast food places divvy out are somehow not enough for us.

I’ll gobble those fuckers up like I’ve never had a french fry in my life. Like I didn’t just inhale the rest of the contents of that now (nearly empty) bag just moments before.

And yet somehow, despite all of this gluttonous behavior, these final fries are the best ones, aren’t they? Why is that? Is it because it’s a symbol of extra, of bonus? Or is it because you never expected to have these treats and their discovery has made you, simply, that grateful? Or, most likely, is it that sitting in their own grease and mixing with whatever (likely cancer causing materials) the bag is made of brings out the very best in the French Fried Potato?

We’ll never know, but it doesn’t matter.

Polar Opposite of this Feeling?: Expecting there to be extras left over in the bag and either someone took them or the place didn’t give ’em. Either way, fuck that place and the person you came in with.

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